Football transfer rumours: Arsenal’s Robin van Persie to Barcelona?
Wed, Feb 1, 2012
Today’s tattle wonders if there’s a bootleg Mark Chapman?
Go on, clear off. There’s nothing for the likes of you round here today. Just can’t get enough? Who do you think you are? Dave Gahan? Got your leather strides on, have you? Anyway, The Mill is closed and the window, too. Sorry, that should read: “10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. The transfer window has slammed shut.” Still, I suppose as I’m sweeping up in here there might be one or two things left over from last night. Let’s see what we can find.
Cor, Ryan Giggs, you know? Giggsy, isn’t it? Mmm? Giggsy-wiggsy? Mmm? Oh! Ryany Giggsy-wiggsy. Isn’t it? You know, marvellous … He wants a new contract at Manchester United to play on until the summer of 2013, according to the Sun. They even have a quote from Sir Alex Ferguson to back it up, one which sounds like that cheerful bloke from Wheeler Dealers after he’s kicked all four wheels and checked the exhaust for leaks: “There has been no deterioration in his play so why shouldn’t he stay?”
The Mill had to run up the road to buy the Times to find out that Barcelona did consider a last-minute offer for Manchester City’s Carlos Tevez but changed their minds. Milan and Inter refused to go to £25m so the Argentinian remains at Manchester City or, indeed, in Argentina.
Barça have instead decided to save their war chest and splurge it all on Arsenal’s Robin van Persie, says the Mirror. At Tuesday’s press conference Arsène Wenger described his forward thus: “You have national class, international class and world class, and Robin is world class.” Is international class the equivalent of club class, then, or super economy? He doesn’t say.
The “world’s greatest newspaper”, the Daily Express, reckons that Andrey Arshavin has another month of the Russian transfer window to make his bolt to Anzhi Makhachkala. In other Arsenal news Jack Wilshere’s chances of making a comeback from injury this season are looking pretty bleak, according to the Mail. The Star adds that the England midfielder “has suffered another stress fracture of his right ankle”.
Elsewhere David Beckham will cavort in his pants during Sunday’s Super Bowl, well, the ad breaks during the match. He’s set to do that bodybuilder thing where he rolls his muscles like Jodie Marsh to the Animals’ Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood. In unrelated Beatles news it is still to be confirmed whether the Animals’ Eric Burdon is the Egg Man of I Am the Walrus but the evidence is pretty compelling. Back to Beckham, and the Sun says: “Goldenballs looks mean and moody as he poses in tight white trunk briefs. He shows off his tattoos and ripped body.” The author then goes off in search of smelling salts.
And that’s about it. The circus has left town but never despair it will be back next week when the emergency loan market opens.
0 comments:
Post a Comment